Dear one, have you been feeling stuck lately? —Are there painful memories or thoughts looping in your head, hurting you over and over? —Do parts of your life get consistently neglected because it hurts to turn toward them? —Are repeating relational patterns wearing you down? —Do your biggest dreams keep getting back-burnered? If yes, I have […]
Are You Stuck in a Response Rut? How Your Listening Can Deepen or Distance Your Relationships
–> Have you ever wanted to support someone, but what you said or didn’t say seemed to make things worse? –> Do you rerun conversations afterward, cringing about what you said, and wishing you could have a “do-over”—even if you aren’t exactly sure what you’d do or say differently? –> Do you fear conflict, because […]
Why is Self-Compassion So Elusive? (And A Three-Step Process for Priming the Pump!)
When I started learning Nonviolent Communication (NVC) a decade ago, one of my first teachers heavily emphasized self-empathy—that is, sensing into our own feelings and needs as a method to understand and connect with ourselves—as the easiest and most readily available source of empathy and compassion. “Self-empathy is your best friend,” she said. Her preference […]
Embracing Your Joys and Your Sorrows: Living Your Whole Life with Presence
Six weeks ago, my home burned down. In ten minutes. While I was out of town. Complicatedly, the building that burned wasn’t my private residence, though it was the heart of the place where I was living and have frequently visited and lived over the past 17 years. Since August, I’d been living at Wilbur […]
Making Nourishing, Accomplishable New Year’s Resolutions Free of Self-Domination, Defeatism, and “Shoulds”
Every year, an estimated 40 percent of Americans make New Year’s resolutions, but one study suggests that only 12 percent actually accomplish their goals. Why do so many of us start each new year with resolutions, only to drop them once the hope of a fresh start diminishes? The cultural message about our unsuccessful attempts […]